Friday, August 7, 2009

Forty or Bust

In 8 months I will be forty years old. In 8 months I will also be celebrating my 15th wedding anniversary. It seemed like only yesterday I was a twenty-something watching "When Harry Met Sally" listening to Meg Ryan bemoaning the fact that she was going to be forty. When Billy Crystal asked when, she replies "Someday!" I thought that was so funny...then. But now forty is barreling down on me and I am feeling the need to make a change and cross off a major and not so major player on my bucket list. I wasn't going to post about this, but, out of the blue, my brother's name was in the comics today and it made me think about all he missed out on by taking his own life. I don't want to get to 60 and still be dreaming about these things that I have been dreaming about for years.

First and foremost, I want to lose 40 pounds in the next 8 months. I'm calling it my 40 by 40 journey. I have been very honest about my food addiction and weight problems and I have PCOS. My PCOS is so bad, in fact, that I had an ovarian cyst rupture on the Fourth of July. Talk about seeing fireworks! So saying this out loud is very scary. But I feel sometimes like I lean on my PCOS like a crutch. I know it makes it so much more difficult to lose weight, so I always have an excuse for why I am not. But today, blog-world, I am taking away my excuse. I am going turn over a new leaf and try again, good or bad, to lose weight. This blog is not going to become about my weight loss adventure, but I will, from time to time update you on how I am doing. I feel like if I have a hundred strangers or so holding me accountable, I might be less willing to justify having a snow cone as often as I have been (the snow cone shack is SO close!)

Next, I want to play one song on my guitar in church by my fortieth birthday. I don't care if it is the simplest hymn in the world, I want to play something! I haven't been able to pick up my guitar this summer since I have my daughter with me all the time, but she goes back to school in 2 weeks and I am going to make sure to make time to learn. Plus the director of the Arts Council and I were talking about bartering for my time. E wants to learn to play the violin, so instead of them paying me, thay may do a service exchange for me with the violin and guitar teacher. It would be a very even trade considering how expensive lessons are.

Lastly, I want to go to Santa Fe with my husband for our anniversary and my birthday, just the 2 of us, no E! I have wanted to go to Santa Fe ever since I visited it when I was 5 years old. It has been a dream for so long that it is a part of me and every time I see Santa Fe on the tv, I stop and just stare longingly at the pictures. We've never before been able to even contemplate going because of money and the extreme distance, but I am determined to make it. If I have to eat nothing but beans and rice for the next 8 months, I am going to put enough money away to get to Santa Fe!

So there you have it. For those of you who live comfortably and exercise properly and are musically gifted, you may be scoffing at me right now. "Those are her dreams? HA!" But they are. This is what I want. I want my next 40 years to be better than my first 40 years.

I wanted to update you on my dog. He went to the vet on Monday and got a slew of medicines. He is slowly getting better and the better he feels, the more the "raptor" returns. He is playing again and making my daughter laugh harder than she has since our move, so he is well worth the money spent to cure him. I am sorry I can't post pictures of him here, Bubblewench. Friend me on FB and you can see him there.


Jeannie said...

Good for you for making a step in the right direction.

And learning to play guitar at forty? I'm still learning to play piano, my drum, my keyboard, and harmonica and I'm 50. I want to take art lessons too.

L. said...

I like your plan.

In fact I had a similar goal to lose fifty pounds before I turned 50, umm but that happens in November and lets just say, I'm a little behind schedule. But your post/dream/goal reminded me of the benefits of wrapping something that's not all that fun to do, inside an artistic and inspiring activity. For you that might be losing five pounds in under two weeks; learning a new chord; stuffing some money away in a jar for the New Mexico trip, it all becomes part of the same effort (the guitar playing and the trip planning is the obvious artsy part). BTW, I really liked the post about the Hurricane experience. Your narrative was very, very good. I think you wrote somewhere that you want to write childrens books? I think you have a solid ability to do that. And you certainly have a flair for describing local color and experiences - so there's that level too. Think of what you could capture from the visit to Santa Fe.

tamjenic said...

Yeah, I'm 46 & just had the first stirrings of menopause knock on my door. I can't think of any goal to put with that. Probably eat better & get in better shape. I could stand to lose more weight, but I don't do too well with the lose x pounds by Xmas goals.

Green said...

May I suggest looking into SparkPeople? It's an online support group for weight issues. I know a few people who've used it and they've all really liked it.

These are awesome goals, that all seem attainable. Wishing you the best of luck in reaching them!

Jocelyn said...

Santa Fe ROCKS!!! Lots of cool stuff to see. My favorites are the sidewalks...old lady types selling jewelry off of blankets. VERY COOL!

Bubblewench said...

And how did you know I wanted pics? Yes, I will find you on FB... sorry I'm so behind!

Glad to hear you are making positive goals for yourself! YOU CAN DO IT!!