Wednesday, April 15, 2009

Smooshed Boobs and other Randomness

The title caught your eye, didn't it? I had a mammogram today. I know I am young but I have lumpy breasts, so my OB schedules one every two years just to keep a record. Aren't you glad I shared that? Anywho, I went in to have the mammogram and the radiologist would...not....stop...talking...at...me. I am a quiet person and sometimes I make others nervous. There's just something about my personality that makes people feel like they have to overcome for my stillness. I accept that, but NOT when my boobs are being flattened between two plastic plates. And the things this woman was saying....Here's just a few of her "thoughts":

She had "the"divorce and had to go back to school so she was accepted into the education program but realized that God only gave her 2 hands which means she shouldn't have anymore than two kids (Big breath) and so she found out she was accepted into the radiology program on the same day and decided it was a sign not to become a teacher (Gasp) and of course, there's her faith because she is really getting back into her faith but her brother won't even read fortunes cookies or horoscopes, (squish) she will, even though they were raised in the same faith she doesn't think fortune cookies can hurt but she and her daughter stopped for Chinese food one day when they were shopping and she asked her daughter what her fortune cookie said and it said (OMG IS IT OVER YET?) that she was going to go shopping so now she kind of believes in fortune cookies but not horoscopes because not every Scorpio in the world can't have money trouble on the same day and certainly not find true love all at the same time. (Switch boobs) But her brother is a teacher and he has all of his kids reading because they really love Harry Potter but now he has them reading the Twilight books although that might be a sin because some religions are against vampires and such (OUCH) oh sorry, the compression has to be just so, but my brother says it doesn't matter what kids read as long as they are reading, okay we're done here. Do you want to see the images? Come on, take a look.....Don't worry, your boobs aren't really that BIG they're just enlarged for the person who looks at them (PLEASE LET THIS STOP) although your husband might like it, eh?

I swear to you, that is the running commentary from the woman. My eyes were rolling back in my head. I just wanted to get it over with. I'm sure she talks like this because she gets a lot of nervous patients and she is trying to distract them, but for the love of Pete!

So anyway, that was my fun appointment. And how was your day?

One thing, Green, I wanted to let you know your friend's teacher is doing "creative spelling" which is a commonly accepted method of teaching kids to write. It is part of "Handwriting without Tears." There's a lot of debate about its effectiveness, but it is a widely used learning tool. The teacher sounds like he/she is not supporting it well, however. Just so you know.

3 comments:

Jeannie said...

I was supposed to have a mammogram months ago but I lost my requisition slip. I've never had a lump ever and there's no breast cancer in the family whatsoever so I'm not overly concerned.

ty-ping said...

Wait, creative spelling?

Is that where you can write any way you want so long as you "Get the idea down"?

My grade 2 to 4 teacher did that with my class, I cannot spell for crap to this very day, and neither can any of my friends from elementary school that I kept in touch with.
Needless to say when we got the "NEW" grade 5 teacher for english, she was "horeafied"

Green said...

Thanks. I could see how with some kids it makes sense to encourage them to just get their thoughts down on paper. You know, like the ultra sensitive kids or something.

But when you apply this concept to a 6 year old who reads fluently and ASKS if she's spelled something correctly, I think the proper answer is to help her sound out the word and explain grammar and spelling rules, not to wave her off and just say to spell it however she likes.

Clearly, not a fan.