I was doing so well.
I really was.
I was breathing and calm, trying to keep a level head about everything. But today...
TODAY I FEEL INSANE!!!!!
What's our new church going to be like? What's the parsonage going to be like? Are the people going to be supportive or mean and grumpy? Am I going to be able to find a new job? Hubby's not getting the huge raise we were promised, are we going to be able to make ends meet until I DO find a job? Will E adjust? Will my parents ever forgive me for moving 5 hours away when they just moved here to be closer to me? Is this all going to work out? Will our current church be able to pay Hubby his back salary or are his future paychecks in jeopardy now as well?
I know...I know...it will. It will all be okay and it will all be what I make of it. I know these things but that doesn't stop my head from spinning. I want to just pack up and leave now. I don't want to go through the process of telling my school parents. I don't want to finish out this school year being unhappy. I don't like long, drawn out goodbyes. Raise a margarita with me and send me off! Don't make me sit here for the next three months and listen to people bemoan the fact that we are leaving.
It's days like this that I wish I had a vice stronger than Diet Coke. Speaking of which, someone STOLE my diet coke out of our work refrigerator yesterday, drank HALF of it and put it back in the fridge! They couldn't even be bothered to drink the whole thing and hide the evidence! Bastards!
Okay, meltdown over, time to get it together and go back to being the totally together SUPERWOMAN! Thanks for noticing me.