Sunday, November 23, 2008

Overprotective Mom or Right on Time Mom

What's your opinion?

So I am at church today, as always on a Sunday. You know, I should get paid since my attendance at church is kind of mandatory...but anywho, I digress. Our church is actually made up of two mammoth old brick buildings. There is only one set of bathrooms for both buildings and both buildings are adjoined by a back hallway. The bathrooms are in this back hallway of the buildings and located within eyesight of the nursery. I was in the nursery after the service watching a child for another parent when E decided she needed to go to the bathroom. She left the nursery, went down the hall and went to the women's restroom. She's 7 and most of the people had left for the day, so I really wasn't worried about her going by herself.

Coincidentally, I was watching a child because his dad had to take his sister to the restroom. But the dad took his daughter to the men's restroom because he is, well, a man and that's his comfort zone obviously. Anywho, the child I was watching decided he wanted to go to the bathroom as well so I walked out of the nursery with him just in time to see a male church member walk into the women's restroom. I waited for a second, but he didn't walk out.

Now, it is not unusual at the end of a service to see a man throw a piece of trash away in the women's room since the trash can is right by the door, so I didn't panic at first. Maybe the man was checking something out in the mirror? I don't know. I didn't want to jump to conclusions, but I quickly crossed the 20 or so feet to the bathroom. As soon as this man saw me, he left the bathroom without a word to me and walked into the fellowship hall. E was still using the toilet and never knew the man was there (or at least, that he was a man.)

I know this man. Not well, but I have had conversations with him. I wasn't too nervous about him being in the bathroom until he walked out without saying a word to me. I wanted him to offer some sort of explanation as to why he was alone with a 7 year old girl in a restroom. Even if he had a urinary emergency and needed to use the toilet, I would have rather heard that then be thinking what I am thinking now. He has 4 children, you would think he would know how this appears. But his lack of speech, to me, makes me feel like he was up to no good and now I am worried. Was he up to no good?

Opinions, anyone?


Anonymous said...

I have found that usually if it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck, then well, it's probably a duck.

-Hoping I'm wrong,


Anonymous said...

right on time. There is no reason for a grwon man to go into the womens bathroom. None. I don't even think the trash reason is any good.

the only thing i can think of that might give this person any leeway in my mind is if he didn't know that E was in there. It still begs the question of why he was in the girly room anyway but it's possible he didn't see her feet.


But I agree with Tamjenic

Oh and this is Andie but I am too lazy to sign in! LOL!

Anonymous said...

Well, I've gone to men's washrooms when I had to pee too badly to wait in the lineup for the women's washroom (why is the women's lineup always ten times longer than the men's? I see this at sporting events and shake my head wondering why the people who build those stadiums still don't get that yet). Is it possible he was in the women's washroom because the men's was full?

If not, something stinks in Denmark.

Anonymous said...

why don't you tell your husband to confront that man? or you do it. Listen to your instincts, that was not normal behavior on his part - especially at a church.

Anonymous said...

Listen to you heart. If you felt uncomfortable then there is a reason for it. You are a good mother, a really good mom. Never underestimate your intuition. It is always right.

Anonymous said...

Worst thing about bad people is that they are in everyone.
It could be something innocent, he thought it was the mens room, mens room was full, just wanted to pick something from his teeth or pop a zit without someone seeing him do it.

He could have avoided saying something to you out of simple embarassment of being in the ladies bathroom, thinking it was even MORE suspicious to say something once he noticed it was your daughter that was in there.

I guess a best bet would be to watch his kids. If a man is going to do something inapropriate to children there is the higher possibility that he will do it to his own due to a larger amount of authority over them. If they seem okay (and you have to look for little signals since they'll be trying to be okay) then maybe don't worry about it.

Confronting him will either make you look like a jerk or make him even more sneaky and vindictive about whatever it is he was wanting to do.

Just keep your eyes out and your mind cynically open.

Diana said...

I'd bet he just thought it was the men's room and then was too embarrassed to say anything when he saw you watching. I've done exactly that, myself.

Terra Tenshi said...

The best advice I can give you is to go with your instincts. A friend of mine once risked her job by asking mall security to a grown man when she was working in a kids store because he didn't feel right to her. In the end it turned out he had a bench warrant out for him in regards to a little boy found raped and murdered in the next state over.